Yes, shame on me for neglecting my blog for almost 3 years! But in my defense, there have been alot of changes in my life during this time. I got laid off from my good paying job in April 2013. Unemployment insurance just didn't quite pay the bills, so in October 2013 I moved back to my hometown to stay with and care for my mother who suffers from Alzheimer's Disease.
My alcoholic son had to live somewhere other than with me, so I bought him a plane ticket to Texas to stay with a friend he had met while living at a halfway house in Arizona. That lasted about 6 months. His friend was also an alcoholic who drank at night and fought with his live-in girlfriend, so that didn't work out. I bought him another plane ticket to go live with a high school buddy and his wife in Utah. (I know, I am such a good codependent.) That went OK for a while. Dale was working 2 jobs and seemed to be doing alright. Then he ended up back in the hospital in Utah with pancreatitis. His 2nd episode in less than 2 years. It was so hard for me to be so far away, but I didn't go to him.
Of course, I eventually ended up letting him come and live in my mother's house with us. Since that time, because of his drinking, he has had and lost numerous jobs, was in the hospital for the 3rd time with pancreatitis, wrecked my car, got a DUI, stole money from my mother, and was in and out of 3 different hospitals in April of this year. His DUI sentence was an $875.00 fine, 6 months suspended sentence to 2 years probation and report to the court referral officer (CRO). Since he continued to always go back to the alcohol, the CRO had his probation revoked and issued a warrant for his arrest. When the deputy came to the house to get him, he was waiting for a friend to come pick up him and he had a forged check in his pocket on my mother's account for $100. I am grateful the deputy showed up when he did, but it was hard to see him put in handcuffs and taken away. As of 5/25, he is now in an addiction rehab facility for 3 weeks.
Through all this insanity with my son, I have been doing improvements and redecorating this 51 year old house, dealing with mother's progressing Alzheimer's, totally rewired my sister's 1977 Toyota pickup, acquired an 11-yr-old rescue dog named Noah, and started doing mystery shopping to make some income. I am so grateful for Spring because I love flowers. Flowers make me happy. Being able to beautify the yard with flowers has lowered my stress level. As a Christian, I know that God has a plan for my son's life and have been learning to trust that all is going as God has planned and Dale will eventually reach his rock bottom and learn to live sober. The Serenity Prayer has helped me when I just didn't know what to pray any more.
God, grant me the Serenity
To accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
And Wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time,
Enjoying one moment at a time,
Accepting hardship as the pathway to peace.
Taking, as Jesus did, this sinful world as it is,
Not as I would have it.
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His will.
That I may be reasonably happy in this life,
And supremely happy with Him forever in the next.
Amen.
I am going to try to write more often, even if no one reads it but me.
